The Amazing Luck of the Irish

JD Hancock

Photo Credit: JD Hancock via CC Flickr

I love to find and read all kinds of stories. I like tales that warm the heart, stir the soul, fire up the imagination, explore history, and discover lessons that I can apply throughout my lifetime. Well, today’s true story is one that is a fascinating account of…what some people refer as…the “Luck of the Irish.”

I hope that you enjoy it as much as I did!

In the Young Irish disorders, in Ireland in 1848, the following nine men were captured, tried and convicted of treason against their majesty, the Queeen, and were sentenced to death: John Mitchell, Morris Lyene, Pat Donahue, Thomas McGee, Charles Duffy, Thomas Meagher, Richard O’Gorman, Terrance McManus, and Michael Ireland.

Before passing sentence the judge asked if there was anything anyone wished to say. Meager, speaking for everyone in the group said, “My lord, this is the first offense, but not our last. If you will be easy on us this once, we promise, on our word as gentlemen, to try to do better next time. And next time, we sure won’t be fools enough to get caught.”

Thereupon the indignant judge sentenced them all to be hanged by the neck until dead and then drawn and quartered. Passionate protest from all over the world forced Queen Victoria to commute the sentence to transportation for life…to the far…wild Australia.

In 1874, word reached the astounded Queen Victoria that the Sir Charles Duffy who had been elected Prime Minister of Australia was the same Charles Duffy who has been transported 25 years ago. On the Queen’s demand, the records of the rest of the transported men were revealed and this is what was uncovered….

Thomas Francis Meagher – Governor of Montana

Terrance McManus – Brigadier General, United States Army

Patrick Donahue – Brigadier General, United States Army

Richard O’Gorman – Governor General of New Foundland

Morris Lyene – Attorney General of Australia

Michael Ireland – Succeeded Morris Lyene as Attorney General

Thomas D’Arcy McGee – Member of Parliament Montreal, Minister of Agriculture and President of Council Dominion of Canada

John Mitchell – Prominent New York politician. He was the father of John Purray Mitchell, Mayor of New York at the outbreak of World War 1

  • Author Unknown

 

Simply Amazing!!

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The Wonderful World of Albert Einstein

DonkeyHotey

Photo Credit: DonkeyHotey

Albert Einstein, the legendary German physicist is a person that has always fascinated me. This genius who developed the theory of relativity and E=MC2, loved his music, had a remarkable sense of humor, and, surprisingly, valued money very little.

So, I have decided to share with you, a few interesting short stories about him that I think that you will find not only fascinating but also entertaining. They will also give you a little insight and appreciation for one of the smartest men the world has ever known.

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Albert Einstein used to have a personal driver that drove him to each one of his lectures. During his speeches, his chauffer would sit at the back of the hall and listen to Einstein’s words of wisdom. After a period of time, the driver remarked to the famous researcher that he could probably give the lecture himself because he had heard it so many times.

At the next lecture stop, Einstein and the driver switched places…with Einstein sitting at the back of the room, dressed in the driver’s uniform. The driver gave the lecture flawlessly..

At the end of the lecture, a member of the audience asked a detailed scientific question about some kind of scientific matter. Without missing a beat, the “lecturer” replied, Well, the answer to that question is so simple, I’ll let my driver, sitting at the back there, answer it.”

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When Albert Einstein was in residence at the Institute for Advanced Studies at Princeton during his later years, a guest asked him if Einstein would show him his laboratory.

The famous scientist and mathematician smiled, held up his fountain pen and pointed to his head!

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Money meant very little to the legend, Albert Einstein. When he first joined the Princeton Institute for Advanced Study, he requested a salary so low, officials had to double it to preserve some semblance of institute standards.

He once used a $1,500 check from the Rockefeller Foundation as a bookmark…then lost the book! The foundation’s records were out of kilter for months. When they finally sent a duplicate check, Einstein wrote back, “What’s this for?”

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Einstein, who thought himself as an accomplished violinist, was rehearsing a Haydn composition with a string quartet.

When Einstein failed for the fourth time to get his entry in the second movement, the group’s cellist looked up and somewhat annoyed and said, “The problem with you, Albert, is that you can’t count.”

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Einstein was once asked by the press for an explanation of his theory of relativity which would be meaningful to the common, everyday lay person. The scientist then gave a statement to his secretary which read, “An hour sitting with a pretty girl on a park bench passes like a minute, but a minute sitting on a hot stove seems like an hour.”

The Amusing Side of Aviation

simon_seesI enjoy hearing funny conversations that go on between people during their everyday lives. Today, I am posting some of the hilarious statements that were made between airport control towers and airline pilots. I found these on the great web sites, tickld.com and freemaninstitute.com. I hope you enjoy them as much as I did!

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Tower: “TWA 2341, for noise reduction turn right 45 Degrees.”
TWA 2341: “Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?”
Tower: “Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”
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From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: “I’m f-ing bored!”
Ground Traffic Control: “Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!”
Unknown aircraft: “I said I was f-ing bored, not f-ing stupid!”
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O’Hare Approach Control to a 747: “United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o’clock, three miles, Eastbound.”
United 329: “Approach, I’ve always wanted to say this…I’ve got the little Fokker in sight.”
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A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long rollout after touching down.
San Jose Tower noted: “American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able.
If you are not able, take the Guadelupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport.”
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A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich, overheard the following:
Lufthansa (in German): “Ground, what is our start clearance time?”
Ground (in English): “If you want an answer you must speak in English.”
Lufthansa (in English): “I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany. Why must I speak English?”
Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): “Because you lost the bloody war!”
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Tower: “Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7”
Eastern 702: “Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway.”
Tower: “Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?”
BR Continental 635: “Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern… we’ve already notified our caterers.”
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The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.
Speedbird 206: “Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway.”
Ground: “Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.”
The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: “Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?”
Speedbird 206: “Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now.”
Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): “Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?”
Speedbird 206 (coolly): “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, — And I didn’t land.”
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While taxiing at London’s Gatwick Airport, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: “US Air 2771, where the hell are you going? I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it’s difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!” Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: “God! Now you’ve screwed everything up! It’ll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don’t move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?”
“Yes, ma’am,” the humbled crew responded. Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: “Wasn’t I married to you once?”
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Tower: “Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o’clock, 6 miles!”
Delta 351: “Give us another hint! We have digital watches!”
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Here are some humorous tips on the subject of aviation:
* Takeoffs are optional. Landings are mandatory.

* If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back they get smaller. (unless you keep pulling the stick back — then they get bigger again)

* Flying is not dangerous; crashing is dangerous.

* The propeller is just a big fan in the front of the plane to keep the pilot cool. Want proof? Make it stop; then watch the pilot break out into a sweat.

* It’s best to keep the pointed end going forward as much as possible.

* Every one already knows the definition of a “good landing” is one from which you can walk away. But very few know the definition of a “great landing.” It’s one after which you can use the airplane another time.

* The probability of survival is equal to the angle of arrival.

* Those who hoot with the owls by night should not fly with the eagles by day.

* A helicopter is a collection of rotating parts going round and round and reciprocating parts going up and down — all of them trying to become random in motion. Helicopters can’t really fly — they’re just so ugly
that the earth immediately repels them.

* Trust your captain . . . . but keep your seat belt securely fastened.

* There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing: Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.

* A fool and his money are soon flying more airplane than he can handle.

* Try to keep the number of your landings equal to the number of your takeoffs.

* Gravity never loses! The best you can hope for is a draw.

* It’s better to be down here wishing you were up there, than up there wishing you were down here.

A Sad Tale: No One Believes Seniors Anymore

 

Elderly in Brighton

Photo Credit: Gary Knight via CC FLickr: Going for a walk down East Street.

An elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired.
Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they’d shared, where Jerry had carved I love you, Sally.

On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armored car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up and, not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money – fifty thousand dollars!

Jerry said, “We’ve got to give it back.”

Sally said, “Finders keepers.” She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic.

The next day, two police officers were canvassing the neighborhood looking for the money, and knocked on their door. “Pardon me, did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armored car yesterday?”

Sally said, “No.”

Jerry said, “She’s lying. She hid it up in the attic.”

Sally said, “Don’t believe him, he’s getting senile.”

The agents turned to Jerry and began to question him.

One said: “Tell us the story from the beginning.”

Jerry said, “Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday …….”

The first police officer turned to his partner and said, “We’re outta here!”

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I hope this funny little story brought a smile to your face and a giggle to your soul. Now go out and share a smile with someone today!!

 

An Ode to Thanksgivng

Mike Licht

Photo Credit: Mike Licht via CC Flickr

Ode to Thanksgiving

May your stuffing be tasty
May your turkey plump,
May your potatoes and gravy
Have nary a lump.
May your yams be delicious
And your pies take the prize,
And may your Thanksgiving dinner
Stay off your thighs!

The Hilarious World of Cats!

Photo Credit: Fireflydaily.com

Photo Credit: Fireflydaily.com

I love cats! When I was a kid, we used to have many cats running, sleeping and playing around the house. Both of my parents really enjoyed having the critters around and my grandmother, who lived with us, loved them as one of her own grandchildren.

One of the funniest things I enjoy watching, are cats doing silly, funny, and surprising things. Sometimes, they make me laugh so hard that they make me cry. 

So, what I decided to do today was to share some of these funny gifs with you (gifs are small movies, that last a few seconds). I think that you will find yourself giggling and laughing at the silliness and stupidity of our furry friends.

So, without further ado, let the laughs, snickers, and giggles begin!!

And away we go!

Peek-A-Boo…I see you!

Itsy Bitsy spider…..

“I’m a monster!”

“Has anyone seen Kitty?”

King of the Hill!

“Ok….enough of you Psycho cat!”

Stop Thief!

What the ?????

“Wait….what was that??”

Hit the SNOOZE button

Geronimo!

Houston…we have lift off!

HA! HA! HA!