A Few Silly Jokes to Make You Smile

LaughingEveryone needs a good smile and laugh every day…today is no different. So, today, I decided to list a few “Corny” jokes that, I hope, will help make your day a little brighter and a bit more joyful.

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I started a band called 999 Megabytes — we haven’t gotten a gig yet.

A grasshopper sits down at the bar. The bartender says ‘hey, I gotta drink named after you.’ The grasshopper says ‘you have a drink named Steve..? ‘

Two drums and a pair of cymbals fall off a cliff…. Budum tssshh!!!

The Stationery Store moved today.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

Two lepers playing poker, one threw his hand in, the other laughed his head off.

A three legged dog walks into a saloon and says “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw”

Dwarfs and midgets have very little in common.

Today, I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a wall. As he turned and sneered at me, I thought: ‘that’s a little condescending’

When my wife said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking…and then I saw her face.

I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.

Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one – and let the other one off.

Two TV antennae meet on a roof – fall in love – get married.  The ceremony was lousy – but the reception was great!

6 out of 7 dwarfs aren’t Happy.

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Have a great day! Share a smile with someone today!!

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Photo Credits: Francisco Osorio, cheriejoyful, k4dordy, Boudewijn Berends, Ciaran McGuiggan

 

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